Humility - The Art of Owning Who We Are

Part of the practice of being human means learning to own more deeply who and what we are. And for me personally, such a practice orbits around humility.

Let me be clear about my definition of humility. It isn’t about apologizing for who and what you are, but, as I say, avoiding favoritism and owning more fully who and what you are—fabulous and inevitably, tragically flawed. One doesn’t come without the other.

So, it seems to me what we need to practice is holding them both in our awareness—embracing them, living in the creative tension between them. For such an orientation helps foster openness and an ability to cut ourselves (and others) some slack for what it really means to be human.

It also facilitates an ability to integrate the package and put it to creative use. Which brings me to the word ‘balance’, a word I hate. So, I’m not advocating balance, as such, but an artful, life-nurturing asymmetry—a notion I have a great deal of confidence in (for more check this post out: An Artful Asymmetry).

The practice of humility, then, is essentially part of the art of being human—an opportunity for immersing ourselves more intelligently, creatively and deeply, in the mysterious atmosphere which granted us life in the first place.

How cool is that?

It’s pure, pragmatic poetry.

Letting Go, Letting Be and the Liberated Life

Letting go, for reasons not entirely clear to me, is a phrase that has always rubbed me the wrong way.

In the past I think I have treated letting go as a sort of ultimatum (I hate ultimatums) requiring me to relinquish things that were important to me. In frustration, I had a tendency to overcompensate, so not only did I let things go, I effectively gave them a shove for good measure.

Letting be makes a lot more sense to me (it is so much friendlier), as it is not so much a relinquishing of life, but a releasing of any tendency toward taking a choke-hold on it.

Liberating whatever it is that we may find ourselves tempted to cling to, gives us space to breathe, time to locate our peaceful place and take stock of things more objectively—to integrate.

In the same way that every white-water enthusiast knows it is smart to take the boat out of the river once in a while—to stand on the shoreline and assess the next set of turbulent variables—letting be gives us space to process whatever life may be putting in our way, an opportunity to step back and observe any and all challenges.

It requires summoning all our skill, intelligence and deep faith in our abilities. It means acknowledging the risk of failure, and the inevitability of change.

Or we could just live in denial … (yes, I’m kidding).

Letting go/letting be is not really an ultimatum then. It is an act of generosity bringing us in greater intimacy with the contents of our life, particularly the complex nature of our emotional life—that which impacts our ability to relate well both to ourselves and others …

… to love and be loved.