Empathy, as I
think of it, is rooted in better understanding the architecture of the human
heart, particularly as it pertains to the expression of pain and suffering both
in our own life, and the lives of others.
Specifically, it
is the ability and willingness to put ourselves in another’s place in life in
order that we might not only better understand their life (the nature of their
pain and suffering), but locate the deep well of compassion in our own hearts
for such pain and suffering and be motivated to alleviate it, if only by expressing solidarity in understanding.
Of course, if we
really want to know something about the nature of human suffering, we need to start
by examining the depths of our own heart and soul first—suspending judgement,
employing curiosity, compassion and patience.
In a fashion
similar to the way kitchen scraps are transformed into fertile soil when put on
the compost pile, this act of turning inward to feel what we feel and
acknowledge what we perceive there, opens our hearts allowing our experience to
speak and reveal its insight/s to us.
It’s called
meditation, a very organic process, not instantaneous, but with consistent
contemplative care the wisdom to be gained from listening to the heart is
eventually revealed—a simple, but indispensable prescriptive.
In the end, empathy
is the art of understanding all it means to be human—the struggles and
challenges, beauty and joy. We need to cultivate the skill of working effectively
with the complex material of the heart, to hold space for it all, one heart and
soul at a time, beginning with our own.
